This is an old post that saved in my draft but I am still sharing

It is Friday YIPEEEE....I have picked up my niece today who I love dearly. I get to have her all weekend next week. Natasia is growing so fast. I can't believe sometimes that she is already 12 I am not ready to get in a car with her. She can drive in 2-1/2 yrs and I am scared.

Me talking to myself "I have issues" lol

No point to state the obvious..... Since I have been on last not much has changed. I have had lots of ups and downs. This year I will be turning 32 and I feel like I I have not accomplished much....I need a hobby/I want a hobby..hmmmm....what am I good at lets see - Im pretty damn good at my job but I cant turn that into a hobby - I know I am an awesome mother but kids are getting older and they no longer need mommy so no hobby there unless I start to smother them they would hate me - I think I am pretty good at watching TV and sleeping...Nope still no hobby - I like to bake but that can get expensive but that can still be an option (Yeah I might be getting somewhere) - I like to dance maybe I can look up a dance class (wait I have they are expensive) but that can still be an option keep looking until you you find one in your means - stillllll......thinking.....that is all I can muster up....I have to know more things Well that is my first problem I have a mental block but why....I need some friends but sometimes friends can cause problems...Why are you so neg? I know I stop myself all the time from being happy Why? I know only I can answer that but i just wish someone else could do that for me.....I'm so tired mentally I need to come out of this rut. I have been there before and it is an ugly road but the difference is this time I know I am having a problem.....Think of good things ok here we go - over all I am in good health - I have 2 amazing children - A sister I love more than my ownself and a brother that I would give my life up for if he ever needed me to - lots of nieces and nephews that love me and are so much fun to be around As I am should be trying to better myself I am thinking about funny crap my daughter says Kylee: mommy I don't want to go to school Mommy: whats the problem now? Kylee: Because I have learned all that I need to Mommy: (laughing inside) but saying Kylee everyday you are getting older and you will need to learn new things. Kylee: thinking for a second....mommy my tummy hurts (this is just another ploy to not have to go to school) Mommy: ok maybe you have to fart? Kylee: No Mommy: maybe you are hungry? Kykee: No Mommy: ok you can take your bubble gum pepto Kykee: No they taste Nasty Mommy: well than I cant do anything for you but you are still going to school Kylee: now with fake tears starting.....arms are folded...she says you are such a mean mommy Mommy: Really! Kylee: but I still love you Mommy: Love you to Kylee XOXOXO